incognito

Yes its me!
hiding behind this beautiful mask I felt like I could go out and commit some crime and never be discovered; I did not do that but I felt like it.
I visited my sisters and mom in December; I had a great time.
The flight up there was awful, first getting through the airport's red tape was a thrill as I had bunched up pants in my socks because I had been wearing boots and when they scanned me with their won, I was beeping all over the place. They had to call a female security guard to pat me down, yes folks because I might be hiding and ilicit explosion device in my socks, it took forever as it was very busy for lady security officers on that day. Finally after the pat down they found that the pants bunched up in my socks appeared in the cameras as a hidden package, seriously folks!!!
Once in the plane I settled in quite nice and turned off all my gadgets and off we flew into the friendly skies. I pulled out the "how to evacuate the plane" instruction book from behind the seat in front of me, because I always like to be prepared to exit a burning or spiriling-down plane. I was a little stressed that I was not sitting in the seat that had the emergency exits, I always imagine myself holding my composure as all the other passengers are panicing as they push forward and trample each other trying to get out. I could see me standing there directing traffic in a calm and authoritative voice, offering my wisdom and comforting passengers with the thought that I am a trained professional and might be able to save their lives in the event they find themselves victims of some blunt force trauma or an impaled object. I was not to far from emergency exit so I just decided to relax and read on about the floating cushions and how to use them. I also made sure that there was a little compartment above me with my oxygen mask and immidiately started to assess those around me that might come in handy should this emergency exit be needed. I was in a sort of trance thinking about all this when before I realized it was time for a snack, I was a little hungry and this a good thing because a "little" or maybe a better word would be "miniscule" bag of peanuts was handed to me, it was cute, sort of like for a Barbie doll, along with water or a very expensive shot of alcohol; I chose the water to water down my peanut, and was happy to get back to my thoughts because it seemed that due to the weather, high winds over the L.A. skies, and the rocking and rolling plane, we might be needing an escape route, the question now was, will I be needing my floaty?
I started to think that to hell with escaping and remaining calm for the other passengers, it was time to pray and say a silent good-bye to all that I knew as my life to this point. The plane was jarred up and down and sideways the whole way to California, and I was thinking that if it went down, there was no way we were going to need any sort of escape route!
I made it safe and sound, when the plane landed it hit so hard that it felt like it was going to break into a million pieces, but I was safe. I took my bags and got the hell out of that toy plane and was stressing over having to come home in a week! Friendly skies, my ass!

Signs!!!

Signs were made to keep us out of harms way, they are used to communicate, to send messages, basically a sign says something to the reader, and so ignoring signs can be deleterious. What I am trying to say is that if you come upon a sign and it says something like, "Beware of Dog", it should be taken seriously. Beware of dog says, basically that you should, beware of dog. Now if you see a sign that says beware of dog in front of a gate and right next to that sign you read another sign that says, no trasspassing, well, pretty much you should not cross that boundry. Perhaps I am giving the average Joe too much credit in thinking that they could take that message and interpret it as what it is, do not go through this gate because you will be considered as trasspassing and there might be a dog guarding his territory and you should beware of him. Now lets just say that you read the signs, and you did not understand the underlying message, to not cross that boundry because you are trasspassing and there is a mean dog that might bite your ass, maybe you are so dense that you just don't get it or maybe you just don't care and you feel signs were made to be ignored, then let me just say that as you come through that gate with those ominous messages that you chose to ignore or misinterpret, when you see that salivating dog running towards you, retreat! do not think for one minute you are the dog whisperer and you will bring this dog to submission with a whistle and jerk of the leash, because you won't. Well now you have done it, you put your hand down in front of his mouth to further ire him and he bites you, be a big boy/girl and do not run to the ER and cry about it. Can you read this sign? "STUPID".

Addendum: This message is being written on March 13, 2012 at 1219 a.m.
regarding the post above, well eventually 3 stupid people got bitten because they ignored our signs and proceeded to cross that boundry and so because of that my dog was considered a "vicious dog" in the community of Astoria, Oregon. I got a ticket and was told that if I wanted to contest it I had to go to court or my dog would be taken into custody and put down, after all he is vicious and you just can't go about letting your vicicous dog protect your home. My husband, Tim (with the highly OCD temper) took it upon himself to get witnesses and show up in court ( I had to work, or I would have been there to show my support). I guess it was quite a trial, the witnesses which included a dog catcher, a street cleaner and a friend of ours, were great as they told stories of this wonderful, loving dog that could not be in any way vicious against the police that ticketed me and their stories of a loose vicious dog violating all the rules and regulations in the neighborhood. But due to the emergency visits of these three victims the law had to get involved. In the end my dog was saved as the judge decided that the bites were probably not due to agressive behavior on the part of the dog, but appropriate reactions to people coming into my property.
I imagined that he would be convicted and he would go to doggy jail or in his case the electric chair and that would have been tragic all because of some real stupid people, what can I say? respect what you read especially when it is on a fence and there is a barking dog behind it!!!!

March 7, 2011

Here we are between Valentines day and St. Patricks day, incredible!. I am still in school and due to be done on Aug 1st of this year, I can see the light, finally!

Not much has happened, I still have no life and I am still looking for that perfect job. I have even gone as far as applying in most Providence hospitals in all states except California. I would love to say that many exciting things have happened but I would be lying. Tim is working as a bar-tender at Camp 9 in Knappa, and as a furniture mover in Astoria; he likes both jobs. I have been a diet for several months and have managed to loose 24lbs. with little effort. I would loose more if I quit drinking alcohol, but that is not going to happen because it is the only thing that keeps me sane for now.

I have not read any new books or seen any movies, basically, I work, study, and play dead on my couch.

My daughter is still in New York and she is doing great. My youngest son is getting married in August, and my oldest son is just hanging out and enjoying his carefree life.

I feel that something big is going to happen, since I will be done with school and plan to do something with my life. The plan is to go where ever I get hired and Tim will stay behind and care for the house until I find out if I like my job. I think it is a great idea since I am not very anxious about selling my house or renting out to some idiot that will destroy it.

We do have a roomate, and she is working out great; she is a fine young woman and Parker loves her. She is not aware that when she decides to move, Parker is going with her; Ha!

The weather has been very Coastal, wet and cold. We saw the sun for two days, people in town were going crazy. It was like seeing cockroaches scram with the lights go on! We are so desperate for sunshine that we become mindless and just run out in the sun. The bad part is that we tend to come to this delusion that because it is sunny, it is warm; not so!

I am guilty of this delusion, so I put on some fairly skimpy clothing and take off to the end of town to my favorite bar, for exercise, thinking that I will enjoy the sun and saunter back after a drink or two. Now this has not happened once or twice, but all the damn time there is a ray of sunshine pouring through my normally bleak, living room. I just can't seem to learn that this is a ploy created by that deceitful Sun God, to get me out in my skimpy clothing (skimpy clothing here on the coast consists of a couple of layers, a coat and warm boots, scarf, and mittens) start of on a long walk only to have the Sun God hide behind a black cloud for a long period, (enough time to get me back to the realization that I no longer feel my lower half of my body) then out again to begin the thawing process. I am always falling for this, and end up freezing to near death, calling a taxi, or Tim if he is anywhere near-by, to come get me.

Ah yes! but I will no longer fall for that ploy again, for I have grown wiser of ways of the sun!!

I have my heavy coat, tights, furry boots, scarfs, umbrella and anything else to keep me warm, so yesterday that sun was out, looked so nice, it lured me out but like I said, I was not to be fooled, no siree, not this time. Tim and I got ready, and we stepped out into the beautiful day and started up town, about a mile in, we came to the conclusion that, this was a hot day and we were over dressed, seriously! we were sweating. He ended up carrying the extra layers up town! damn that Sun God. On the way back we were glad we had our layers, because it was so cold and there was a black cloud looming over us, we make it half way, until the skies opened up and let that black cloud empty out on us! This time it was the Rain God that was messing with us! I really need a life.

This picture was taken in September in Garibaldi on the beach with Tim's family....

La! La! La!

family x-mas portrait?

This is a very important image, because it consists of 5 adults and 4 species of animals, 5 if you include the humans involved. I have always considered myself a good photographer but I would never consider doing it professionally, simply because I do not like to take posed pictures. I am moody and like to take unique pictures, but a friend asked me to take a family picture of with her animals for a Christmas card, I was reluctant at first simply because I do not really have professional equipment and because I really can't get into it when I have to rely on posing but, I agreed and this is the end result it looks simple but this picture is a miracle. I had it in my mind that I was going to take a family picture, you know,husband, wife a horse and a dog, but when they picked me up and I shared the back seat with a cat, a rabbit and a very phsycotic little dog; I was quickly thinking how, in the world was I going to get them all to sit still for even 1 nanosecond to take get a respecting family picture worthy of representing the Christmas spirit? I started to sweat which led to hypothermic conditions; not fun. We got to the farm where the horse was housed, and I met my friend's daughter, son, son in-law, and two other dogs, I immidiately felt the tell-tale signs of stress creeping upon my body. It was a freezing cold and over-cast day, the surroundings were beautiful but the situation was MAD! (all the names have been changed to protect the innocent). All at once I was amidst pure chaos. I walked around taking random pictures hoping that I might, in the end be able to piece something together that resembled a Christmas card. Each individual animal had its own personality, to say the least, my favorite was the beagle, because she/he was quiet, cooperative and lay-back. The rabbit said little but I am not sure that rabbits utter any sort of sounds so I do not know if this was personality or just plain, the way it is. He/she seemed mellow and introspective as if to say (what the hell?). The cat a beautiful and very fat cat with the biggest blue eyes was in a quandary, he uttered these deep guttural meowing sounds and appropriately clawed into his master's shoulder, so as to say (what the hell?). Dog number one, a small headed, big bodied Chiguagua-mix was the equivalent of someone on methenphetamines, coffee and a large energy drink; he/she was in a frenzy of energy and ugly. She was always in motion, barking her shrill bark with her body moving in every direction and her eyes protruding with each bark. Dog number two was the beagle I mentioned earlier, calm, cooperative and so happy about wearing antlers (seriously, like that is a whole other animal, what the hell?) but she took it well. The third dog, a puppy, black lab (I think), was doing what puppies do, jump, yelp, and basically flutter with joy and energy; she/he posed a big challenge because I could not see where I was going to get it to sit for even one nanosecond at the same time the others would sit still. The horse was full of energy, he/she wanted to go out and trot and eat hay and maybe even whinny, but no, hell no, "I am going to wear a Santa hat, and pose with all these other animals and maybe even be expected to smile" (not enough carrots in the world for this, what the hell?). I have to reiterate, that it was freezing, and all the humans were wearing white thin shirts, a Santa hat and slacks and nothing else. I have to say that aside from the incredible experience, and comedy of events, the matriarch my friend in charge of this ordeal, had tenacity shown by her untiring event of trying to keep hats and antlers on all the creatures; including her family and by keeping her vicious unpredictable tea cup size Chiguagua, from biting the other animals (it did not work, somewhere between shoots she/he managed to grab the horses lip with her little needle sharp teeth and tear a piece of horse lip off). I took several pictures that with her permission I will post on face book, because they do tell the story of chaos and perseverance. I am one damn good photographer and feel lucky to have had this crazy holiday experience; thank you Jane (not her real name). Will I do this again, I will make sure to ask what type of creatures are involved next time. Merry Christmas! (no animals were hurt in the taking of this picture, well, ok, the horse was but not by me).

some family members!

These are just some pictures of my kids. Dylon with fish is Tim's son

At the top is Nataly and Art, her husband

Savannah, Travi's fiancee and Armani my 4 legged grand-son

Travis and his Cat Resin

Chris and his girlfriend Carolyn

Rachel and her husband Paul.

I was trying to think of a title for this post and I just can't seem to come up with one. It has been a while since I have taken the time to post anything, I think it is because I have been busy with my schedule. I changed from nights to evenings and I was hating that, so I had the opportunity to change from evenings to days and I am not too happy about that either which leads me to believe that I am just not happy. I know that I am ready for a change in jobs but for some reason I have not been able to get a different job, so that leads me to believe that the right thing will come about when I am really more receptive. I am taking a class in public health, it is quite interesting and has opened some doors or at least it has shown me some closed doors and I am thinking of opening them to see inside. I am getting together with our local director of public health to see if I can volunteer or maybe even get a job in this department. I would very much like to be part of my community by finding out what ails it and if there is a way I can help the people in it. I know that as a job, public health does not really pay well, but maybe a part-time job or even just volunteer some time might be good. I still have not started my big project for my Masters, I have just not been in the right mood, but I really have to consider starting since procrastinating in this area would be a bad thing, hmmmm...well I am thinking and I will make a commitment to set some times to start; this week. Tim is out of a job, that does not help my mood, since any little bit of money helps, but I guess I just have to let it be, it is not for the lack of his trying. Nataly is 33 years old as of yesterday, so happy to see my girl growing up, I wish her the best because aside from being my baby girl; she is awesome.

The boys seem to be doing fine, Travis is engaged, that makes me very happy. Chris is just working hard on his comedy and Rachel got married in September; it was a great wedding, in the rain. The dogs are just dogs, I hate my cats, they drive me nuts and my froggie just keeps on trucking. OK, sun is out, I must go and take a long walk in the fresh air. I am stewing because I just got paid and even though I was able to catch up with my mortgage payment; it left me penniless and I mean, nada, maybe 25 dollars to play with, shit! But my bills are paid and that does make me feel like I am working for something; not sure what but something.

The picture was taken on Sunset Beach, Tim and I were out for a walk, and I saw these men ocean fishing, so serene to watch them; I just love it.