Fasssssssssssst Foooooooooooood!

I am a full blooded American and would feel a certain disloyalty to my country if I denied allegiance to the fast-food industry; simply said, I love all fast food, Yes, there have been studies that fast food fed to monkeys, causes them to gain weight due to the trans-fat commonly found in fast food, but I do not McCare, monkeys should be eating bananas not hamburgers. I even heard or read somewhere that some people are suing certain fast-food restaurants such as McDonalds and Wendy’s, for making them fat, again I do not McCare, anything eaten in careless abandon is going to promote a few extra pounds. Fast-food restaurants provide quick service, good prices and delicious food, fast-food restaurants are a fixture in American culture, they give us the “Happy Meal” with a surprise toy and provide us with drumsticks that are finger-licking-good and fast-food comes in different flavors and textures, thick or thin crust. Who can resist the smiling face of a red-haired clown or the cute accent of a chihuahua or the handsome face of the Kernel that share our home through our wide screen televisions, day after day, luring us out of our “couch potato coma” to run out and purchase our daily intake. Critics say that the fast-food industry has caused ill effects on American life; I say that allegation is McCrazy, how can any meal claiming to be happy, cause ill effects? Fast-food restaurants are a Suburbia legend strategically placing themselves in busy places such as, highways, malls and other convenient easy access areas. Another plus to eating fast food; you can do it in the comfort of your cozy pink flying-pig pajamas, because with fast-food comes the comfort of the, drive-through service,and eventually you even manage to learn to love the math illiterate employees with their greasy skin and bad acne and after a few drive-thrus you learn to decipher the bad cutting out words on the microphone while you place your order;it actually becomes a second language. Fast-food restaurants offer the busy consumer a quick meal on their way home from work, school, or the gym they offer to sate your appetite on the way to the opera or on the way to pick up the dog from the groomers. The variety of fast-food available is only limited by your imagination your appetite and how much time you have, to eat. I love fast-food and all that it has to offer, excuse me, “yes, I would like a hamburger with pickles and mayo, hold the lettuce, a large fry and a strawberry malt.” Not that what you order matters since getting what you order is not always an option, but isn't that what Americans thrive on, the element of surprise? Ahh, but that will not deter me from eating at my favorite fast-food restaurants, no siree.